There she was, not 20 feet from him. His heart froze with his step and he lost his breath. After so long, this didn’t seem real. It couldn’t be true, could it? He was dreaming, surely. Again.

She turned her head, her eyes moist and shiny. Beautiful as they’d ever been. Did she see him? Her wavy brown hair was well combed and brushed to the side, revealing her pale neck. Her lips parted a little, a single tear slipping down her cheek. She saw him alright. And she recognized him too. 

She recognized him. But that could be a good thing or a bad thing really, depending on what she remembered. Something inside of him broke and his heart fell, everything returning. It felt like a thousand knives slicing through his chest all at once. His thoughts told him to run. He shouldn’t be here. Should never have come. But his heart burned with the desire to run forward, to hold her. To take in her sweet vanilla scent just one more time. To run his hands through her hair and taste her mouth just one more time. 

Then she stood, wiping the tear with her black sleeve. She was in all black. Black long-sleeve top and black jeans with a little hole over the right knee. She took a long look at him and smiled, collapsing on the inside. He saw it in her eyes, the pain. The same pain he saw in them that day… that horrible day…

He wanted to run. Run to her. Run away. God, his mind was racing. She’d never take him back… would she? His mind flashed back to that night. 

It was cold, she was cold… alone… her fragile heart broken in half. It was his fault. He was ignorant, careless. Wasn’t thinking. But he wasn’t in his right mind that night! He cared, oh yes he did. The guilt was what kept him alive. The guilt burned through his veins and clawed at his heart. The days were lonesome and the nights were unbearable, heavy with the memories. The good and the bad. 

For so long, he ran. He didn’t know what to do or where to go. He just ran. To try and get away from the voices, but they followed. They never shut up. Not until now. He could never get her out of his mind and oh, God, he tried to find her. Though he knew exactly where she was. He just couldn’t find himself. 

How he’d been able to gather enough strength to get here, he didn’t know. At this point, he didn’t care. He was glad. To be able to see her at all and know she was alive was a blessing. But to have to see the pain in her eyes again… to have to relive the day… he couldn’t take it. 

He looked up at her. He didn’t recall ever hanging his head down, really. ‘Say something… do something…’ he thought. She furrowed her brows at him, her jaw tightening. What was she thinking? She wanted him to leave, he thought. She never wanted to see him again. But… he wanted to see her. He wanted to hold her. He wanted her to hold him and whisper in his ear how much she loved him… and that he’d be okay. Just like old times. 

Her lips moved, but he heard nothing. He shook his head, “Say it again…” God, his voice was odd. On the verge of breaking. He hadn’t heard it in so long it was like hearing a stranger’s voice instead of his own. 

She looked at him quizzically, “Do I know you? Do you know me?”

What? Had she forgotten him? No, it was a trick. She knew exactly who he was. She could never forget him or the horrible things he’d caused. 

He stepped closer, “Danielle…”

She flinched back, “How do you know my name?” 

He lost his breath. His heart failed him and crumbled within him. She really didn’t know him. No, it was a dream! She had to remember him! She knew who he was! She ‘d loved him… hadn’t she? It’d only been a year! 

“Uh… Sir, are you okay?” 

He shook his head and placed his hands upon her shoulders. God, to feel her under his fingers… it was heaven. Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth but he cut her off, “Danielle… please stop this… you know me! It’s me! You must remember! Don’t you… remember… high school? The graduation? The beach we always used to go to?” 

More tears trailed down her face, “No… Sir, you need help. I don’t know how you know my name but I am not the girl you’re looking for. I dropped out of high-school during 9th grade. I hate the beach and I don’t know you. Now please… let go of me…”

He started to feel angry. She was playing tricks with his mind! He tightened his grip and shook her a little, crying himself now, “Danielle! Please!” 

“Sir, you need to let go of me and go away…” She said, pulling back. 

‘I don’t know you…’ it replayed itself in his mind. She didn’t remember him. Why? Did something else happen after he left? An accident where she lost all her memory? How could this happen? There was no chance of him getting her to forgive him now. 

“Dan-ielle.” He whispered as the world fell around him. The trees withered and died and the sun exploded in a raging cloud of fire and ash. The ground beneath him shook and cracked, creating an expansive gap in the ground, much like an open wound. 

And in this he fell. Further, further, further still. He blinked a few times, but everything was a blur. He tried to grab the walls, but he was falling too fast. The friction burned his skin until his fingers bled and he screamed. No, not because of the pain but because of Danielle.

How could she do this to him? Forget him as if he was nothing? It was part of the plan. A plan on making him pay revenge. But wasn’t his sanity enough? And every day he spent crying and screaming and shouting and bleeding… doing everything he could to take it all back. It was pathetic. It was useless. As was what he did and what happened. 

All he wanted was for those horrible voices to shut up… not to go away, no, they served as good friends when he was alone or down. But they drove him nuts and never let him forget. Never let him move on. Reminded him he didn’t deserve to be happy. Didn’t deserve her. Didn’t deserve anything until he paid.

‘Do I know you?’ she’d said. She didn’t remember. 

She didn’t remember me….